It's 2016, you'd think there'd be an app to order the perfect guy and have him delivered right to your doorstep. Instead, Uber + Tinder = guys trying to get dropped off at your doorstep...at 3am. Yes, KCMO shuts down at 3am..it's as miserable as it sounds, but you tend to not necessarily realize it until the next morning..errr..afternoon in my case. That extra hour will get ya! Get ya good. C'mon guys, if you're trying to meet up, shoot us a text earlier at least ACTING like you want to see us. With today's technology it should be easy to meet a "decent" guy, right? Yes, it is, you've got that right. But that nice guy is also meeting 20+ other gorgeous women on the same app he's meeting you. In 2016, there are OPTIONS and many women (and sometimes men) are treated as one.
Being single for almost half of a decade, here are the men of 2016:
- The infamous "read" your iMessage, no reply. I'd like to act like this doesn't happen to me. It happens to me, it happens to my friends, and it obviously happens to the people making memes about it on Instagram. This is a thing. So maybe you think things are going well with a guy then all of a sudden - nothing. Well you know what, he met some other girl on that stupid app he met you on - shocker! When this happens, know it's not you. This was hard for me to realize at first. They have other stuff (and women) going on in their life. Move on. They always come back around. Whether it's a late text on a Saturday night or a snapchat on a Monday afternoon, they want your attention when it's not given. And when they do come back around, hopefully you'll already be thinking about the next guy's read receipt.
- "I'm kind of still stuck in a relationship right now but I'm really into you" Psshh. It would take me more than one hand to count all the guys that have "hit me up" with girlfriends. A couple things to note {excuse my language} - quit being a pussy and get out if it if you are unhappy. I can't help you. If you do this to her, you're going to do it to me. Girls - sorry to break your heart, but if a guy is doing this to you, you are not special (to him anyway) he is using you to make up for whatever he is missing in his own relationship. Don't reply!
- The "needy" guys. These guys are ready to JUMP into a relationship. Whoa, hold up there slick, I haven't been in a relationship since George Bush was president (thanks Mike), I'm not even ready to make a phone call. If you're a guy reading this, pull back a little, be yourself, and let things happen.
- Friend ZONEEEEE - does this really need an explanation??
- The partier. This is the guy that dresses in American flag pants to a traditional Saturday night in Westport. He's trying to get you to meet up with him after a good themed party he DIDN'T invite you to and usually the drunkest guy at the bar. He's a great time, but don't expect him to settle down anytime soon, have fun!
victims of read receipts
